Odysseus

As I sit writing this a handful of thunder storms congregate over the house. I love thunderstorms and have been watching a streaks of electricity shoot across the sky freezing everything for a split second in an energy charged strobe. There are about 3 storms circulating, 1 with sheet lightning and the other 2 with forked. The weather is an irony to how I feel.

I'm miserable and as the rain beats against the window and the energy surges through the skies releasing its power. The storms are right overhead and are gaining in their ferocity, I'm actually quite surprised I don't have a migraine as my head is like a barometer.

Things are not going well, I fell like an amputee, even after the limb has gone they say they can still feel twitches and tingles in the part that isn't there - they can still feel what they have lost. I was angry earlier - so angry I could feel the heat of my blood in my veins but I took a deep breath, I had a glass of water and a cigarette and turned off my brain and watched TV but if you asked me what was on I honestly couldn't tell you. MCM is becoming more than a slight irritation. Without being vulgar and divulging certain details of arrangements, I feel that yet again I am being taken for a mug. What irritates me is her total inability to see beyond her sphere or orbit. Anything beyond a 6 foot radius gets ignored. She maintains her happiness and bugger everyone else's though lest you try to be happy - no no no that will never do. She owes me and I am not going to sit down and get the piss taken out of me like a dialysis machine anymore. She hears but doesn't want to listen and as much as I have been accused of playing games and dirty tricks, she casually forgets that she has made several threats to me the result of which is doubtful that I would walk, or even crawl for that matter, away from. As a member of staff for my bank I have access to a safety deposit box which I have made arrangements to start using. It will contain a few letters, One to MLA to be sent to her on her 18th Birthday and various others to people I care about and to a lesser extent I hope care about me. I fear but will never show that crack in my facade as to do so is weakness.

According to astrology my star sign is linked to Odysseus. The victor of the Trojan War, a noble and honourable man who fought for what he believed. A man whom despite a 20 year absence from his wife, upon his return slayed her suitors who had usurped him in Ithaca. The war may be in progress but I do not intend to be a casualty.

I place a lot of faith in astrology and am typical of my sign. My Aquarian traits are as follows:

strong-willed
opinionated
far-sighted / visionary
innovative / inventive
tolerant / unprejudiced / objective
rebellious
laid-back
empathetic
imaginative
humane / humanitarian
genial / friendly / sociable
idealistic
remote / detached / aloof
intuitive
devoted to their goals
free-spirited / rebellious
frank / outspoken
independent / individualistic
intelligent / intellectual
leading / trend setting
patient
engaging
unpredictable
eccentric / unconventional
temperamental
resentful
enigmatic / magnetic
progressive
unemotional / cold

One type of Aquarius person can be shy, gentle and patient. The other type is more enthusiastic and exhibitionist.

Likes
friendship, freedom, intellectual stimulation, camaraderie, surprises, companionship, feeling understood, emotional safety.
Dislikes
jealousy, possessiveness, control, ego plays, pointless meetings, narrow-mindedness, being ridiculed, routines, fighting/violence, inequality, being taken for granted.

All in all not a bad package really is it? The storms have passed and the changing pressure is giving me a mild headache so I shall leave this here and return soon.

Only the heavens have brighter stars......